Who can simply just understand my feelings? you? him? her? they? them? she? he? or me myself?

I am not trying to be very emotional over problems but sharing out and expressing my feelings. Dear readers, kindly bear with me okay! 

My mentally emotions is very low. I tend to think and question myself alot. Hoping to get an answer from nowhere, but there isn't any replies from anyone. I don't know who can I talk to, share my feelings with. One thing for sure, my family members will never be the one that I can talk and share my feelings. They used to be my pillar but not now anymore. I am living in my own whole, believing what I see and hear. Life is never good for me anymore, not because I am broke but the feeling in me is no longer here anymore. 

One thing that I really feel hurt. Few days back while otp with (someone) that person said something that hurt my feelings. Firstly I am sorry to disturb your sleep, if you don't feel like entertaining me just tell me, don't have to force yourself to keep me entertained. 

I know myself, I am not as smart as you, my education level is not as high as you, I never been through what you have been through, I know I know I know! I don't need you to remind me. I know my limit! Blame myself for being so fucking stupid for not studying hard enough in the past, being so freaking playful and reatrded that leads me to who I am right now! I mean RIGHT NOW!! I don't care how people look at me, but I care and mind on how people hurt my feelings. 

I am also a human being with feelings. Please be fair to me too. Once again, I am sorry that I disturb your sleep the other day. I promised I won't call you just to complaint. I will shut the fuck up and sleep like a dead body. I don't wanna create any argument in between us. 

eileen!!!!