You can say I am silly or stupid, but I am not. By random I looked back on those texts conversation we send last time. Arguments, sweet talks, loving words, happy replies, angry replies and even silly replies I smile. I took a huge courage to pressed on the 'delete all' button. No point keeping all text when I have already decided to move on to the next process of my life. I will go for my happiness. I don't know what your trying to tell me or what your thinking. There is one thing for sure I know. What you decide is the best for us. I will go with it. I won't lived in the past anymore. I will find myself back real soon.
I shall stop my foot print here and then walk on the new path. Carry on walking till I reach the new ray of light which belong to me. I believe they are waiting for me out there.
In life there is always happy moment, sad moment. It depend on how we look at it right? Happy or sad we still have to continuing living right? Why not lived with happy moment then?
Anyway let's Count Down:
13 more days to grandpa death anniversary. Time flies really fast. Think back-- -- -- -- -- --many things changed after grandpa you left us. Everyone seem to be stranger when we happened to pass by each other. I don't know how to describe this weird feeling. Well mummy asked me to organized one family outing. The main reason: to gather all the Ong's family, regardless of the young one, adults or the senior adult. Make use of this time to bound up our relationship. And also Uncle early recovery of his illness. Seeing him cried last night infront of the whole family, my heart sink. It's the 3rd time I see him cried so hard. Hope this gathering is the success one. Not cos I am the organizer la. I am so excited and looking forward to it too :)
Something really pissed me off just now. I am running out of ideas for the class t-shirt design. There is only 14 people in this class. No one bother to help out with the design including the class rap. I got to do everything myself. Design, colors, looking for supplier and such. Hello anyone out there understand how I feel not? So what I am the student councilor in class? Doesn't mean I need to do all this shit work for all of you right. I know it's holidays now. Everyone is busy working or going out enjoying. Do you people think that I don't wanna enjoy too? Come on don't be selfish okay. I have enough of all this shit work people. Really.
I don't know if you Darryl will be passing by here not. This is what I gonna say. I am so lazy to type out everything on sms.
The moment when school holidays start, I know this will happen. Whenever you did or said something wrong, it's either you cried and apologized or keep asking me to forgive you. As usual I will give in and I forgive you. You said you will changed, won't do it anymore and such. But your always doing it over again and again. I don't know what can I say anymore. I had enough of all this shit alright. I don't know why I am deserved all this. Your sorry and promises is no longer valid or I should say no effect. I want to trust you again, but w/o failed you will make me lose the trust in you. What I can say now is it's really impossible for you to gain back my trust. I am tired of everything. What i promise Alvin and Big brother I am doing it. We shall remain as classmates instead of friends. I got nothing much to say or comment. I won't ask anything from you from now onward. The impression of you to me it's dropping down instead of rising.
You asked me this before : Is your brother much more impt to me than you?
My answer is: YES! No reason no nothing. Though I know him for 3 months plus plus only. Without failed he will make me smile and laugh. Feel so happy and carefree whenever I am with him. Even if we have only a limited time everyday. I know you did make me smile and laugh before, but this is the past. It's before I know him. I don't know what's the caused of it, and i don't want to know it either. What I can tell you is, I am sure I NEVER fall for him.
It's time for you to step your foot print in my life and move on to the next process of life now.
with love,
Eileen.
Dec is not a good month for me I guess. Counting down to 2012. But not school reopen. Hoping we won't be in the same class anymore.
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